


Chasing Cupid

by LanaBlade



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-09
Updated: 2010-02-09
Packaged: 2017-11-29 14:29:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/688031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LanaBlade/pseuds/LanaBlade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the LJ ksvalentine calendar 2010.  Prompt: Someone on the Enterprise has been playing matchmaker in the weeks leading up to Valentine's Day. Kirk and Spock attempt to uncover the identity of the mystery Cupid, and in the process, become closer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chasing Cupid

When the door to his quarters swung open, Kirk was only thankful for the distraction from the mountain of paperwork he was slowly chipping away at. That is, until he noticed that Spock looked even more heavily starched than usual.

“Captain. May I speak with you?” The dark eyes were set to Vulcan neutral, and his parade rest stance was so perfect that Jim had seen instructors cry tears of joy for it before. He’d thought he was having some luck with getting his First Officer to relax, but you’d be hard pressed to spot it now.

“Of course, Mr. Spock. What can I do for you today?” Jim smiled his most endearing grin in hopes of getting an eyebrow twitch by which to better judge the Vulcan’s tension. Unfortunately, both eyebrows stayed firmly in place and Spock stepped forward, standing even more stiffly if possible.

“Captain, I would like to request that if you find my work lacking in any area enough that it must be overridden that you inform me so that I am aware that I am free to turn my attention to other business.” Jim was so far beyond flabbergasted that he simply stared, his jaw hanging loose. Spock, after a long pause, straightened his back to the point that Jim could have sworn he heard a creak and turned to leave.

“Er… Wait!” Rising half out of his chair, Jim, definitely Jim because the Captain was still floored by the slight nuance of what might have passed as hurt in another voice, leaned over his desk as though he could stop the Vulcan from doing anything he deemed logical. It seemed to work, however, and Spock paused, turning and gracing him with a slightly raised eyebrow. “Spock, your work is always exemplary, and on time, which I appreciate since mine almost never is,” Jim paused to take a breath and gather his scattered thoughts. “What makes you think your work is lacking?”

“Last week, Captain, you reassigned 61.805% of the crew members that I had placed on the duty roster. This week that number increased to 63.888%. The only logical conclusion is that my work is somehow lacking.” At that point, Jim knew he was in for it; After one too many jokes at his expense, Spock had cut back his statistical data to two or fewer decimals.

“Spock, I haven’t changed the duty rosters. Hell, most days I don’t even look at them, I just sign them. You pay far more attention to them than I do, and it’s one more thing off my desk.”

Spock looked at him for a long moment, eyebrow quirked and climbing higher with each passing second. The Captain had seen that look used on diplomatic missions as a sort of inoffensive interrogation technique, and he had to say it was painfully effective.

“I see. If I may request clearance to investigate how the duty rosters are being changed then, Captain.” Spock barely waited for Kirk to nod before spinning sharply on his heel and striding out.

Left staring at the door to his office in bemusement, Jim sighed, “Some poor bastard is going to have a very bad day… But it’s not me, so the hell with it. Go get ‘em Mr. Spock.”

******

Two days later, Kirk was slumped in a chair eyeballing the mound of work still waiting to be finished when Spock again appeared at his door.

“Mr. Spock! Just the man I wanted to see…” Jim cheerfully seized upon the escape and stood up to greet his first officer.

“Indeed, Captain… I would like to review the duty rosters with you personally prior to signing off on them. If you have any objections to the personnel assignments, we may discuss them prior to my submitting them to the computer.” Kirk was pretty sure he wasn’t imagining the sidelong glance that Spock was giving him, and he was very sure he didn’t like it.

“I swear to you, Spock, I never changed the duty rosters. If I had, I sure as hell can’t see why I’d change 60% of it. That’s a lot of people to be shuffling for no apparent reason.” He reached a hand out and hovered it over Spock’s arm, wanting to prove his sincerity but wary of invading the vaunted Vulcan Personal Space Bubble.

“Indeed, Captain. Shall we begin?”

The Captain bit back a resigned sigh and motioned for Spock to begin.

A long, boring hour later, Jim stood and cracked his back, watching Spock enter the duty roster into the ship’s computer banks. “Well, that was fun. I remember now why I let you do that.”

Spock glanced up from the screen and idly noted that the Captain was considerably more flexible than he had previously believed before returning to work. “I have entered the duty roster into the system. In the previous cases, the alterations to the roster occurred within 1.3 hours.”

“Are you planning on hanging around to make sure that I don’t sneak a 60% swap on you?” Jim grinned and held up his hand, “Kidding, kidding. Why don’t we play some chess to kill the time?”

There was a pause long enough to make Jim shift in his seat, then Spock nodded, “That would be acceptable.”

Spock trounced him within twenty minutes on the first game, but the second game was hard fought and Jim had honestly thought he had a chance right up until Spock called check. At that point it was all over but the cleanup, so he conceded with what little grace he had and glared at the board trying to see how he’d missed that last trap so thoroughly.

While he pondered his defeat, Spock rose to check the computer with a satisfied air, only to freeze, eyes narrowing and eyebrows levitating towards his hairline, “Captain…”

“Mmm…?” Kirk didn’t glance up from the board, tilting his head this way and that like a cat.

“Captain, the duty roster has been altered.”

“Mmhm….. Wait, what?” Jim wandered over to peer at the screen, “Well shit. Who authorized the change?”

“According to the computer, Captain, you did.”

“Okay, you totally can’t blame me for that, Spock, you were here the whole time. I didn’t do it!” There was an edge of pouting that Jim couldn’t quite contain. He’d been on his best behavior since getting his ship. He’d been responsible and done his paperwork and had gone to great lengths to avoid pissing off his first officer.

“I am aware of that, Captain.” Spock gave him a look guaranteed to send first year cadets to their dorms in tears. Jim just flashed him a winning grin. “According to the computer, the console accessed to change to files was a maintenance access in Jefferies Tube 12, Deck 6.”

Jim blinked, “Nobody uses the Jefferies accesses for system stuff. I mean, they’re a pain in the back to get to, literally, and Scotty’s got the codes and wiring all screwy… Even if you could get to them without crawling a few hundred feet, you’d still have to figure out what he did to them for them to be of any use.”

Spock considered that for a moment, and then nodded, “That would severely limit the possible culprits as well as their motivations.”

“What do you mean?”

“As you said, knowledge of the engineering and computing modifications would be necessary, and the perpetrator obviously feels a strong need to hide their identity. Also, if I had not brought this information to your attention, it is entirely possible that whomever is doing this would have continued, unimpeded.” Spock rose to his feet, “With your permission, Captain, I would like to inspect the maintenance console the computer indicated.”

Kirk rubbed his hands together, looking at the paperwork on his desk, “Sure, Spock. I’ll come with you. I love a good mystery.”

****

Jefferies Tubes were by far his least favorite part of his ship, Jim had long ago decided, and his opinion of them wasn’t improving as he hunched next to Spock in front of Maintenance Console 107E. The Vulcan was not only unaffected by the heat in the small space, but was somehow managing to keep his back almost perfectly straight without messing up his shiny cap of hair. Jim was very tempted to reach out and muss it in a fit of pique. Sarek was a dozen days travel away, though, so tempting Vulcan wrath was probably a bad idea. They’d found nothing out of the ordinary about or around the console, although Spock had taken one look at the wiring scheme and raised his eyebrow to ‘Schedule time to disembowel the Chief Engineer’ level. Kirk was distractedly following a pair of blue wires that he was reasonably certain didn’t actually connect anything and had a sneaking suspicion spelled something offensive in Andorian when Spock shifted. The space was so close that the shift brought Kirk nose to point with Spock’s left ear and since the first thought that went through his mind was to give Spock a Wet Willie, he cast about for something to distract himself.

“Are your ears as pointed as other Vulcans’?” Okay, so not his most shining conversational gambit, but it kept him from doing something suicidal.

Spock turned, removing the object of temptation, and stared at him for a long moment, “Vulcan ear tips have a variance of 2.67 degrees in their angle, depending on region of origin and age. My ears are in the 80th percentile.”

Kirk blinked at his reflection in the dark eyes nearest him, “So that’s a yes, then, right?”

Spock hitched his eyebrow and made a slight head motion that Jim had long since translated as a full fledged eye roll, “Indeed.”

“Did your mom like your ears?” Oh, shit. Why couldn’t he ever shut up on those rare occasions when he was actually ahead for once?

Spock blinked twice and looked off into space over Jim’s left shoulder, “My mother found Vulcan ears to be one of her two favorite traits. When I was a child she would…” he paused and glanced back at Jim, “I believe the term is ‘blow raspberries’ on them.”

Kirk boggled at that mental image. “Um… Wow. I can’t really picture that. At all.” He shook his head to try and clear the fuzzy half-thought, “What was her other favorite trait?” And now, Jim thought to himself, I’m going to go back to my room and schedule a psych eval with Bones, cause there’s no way in hell I’m mentally sound… Asking questions about Spock’s mom is a questionably sane endeavor. To Jim’s surprise, however, Spock flushed green and turned away, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. We can get out of here, don’t you think? Nothing to see here?”

Spock glanced back at him, his cheeks still slightly flushed, “There is nothing worthwhile to learn here.”

Jim flinched and stared after Spock as he moved away, wondering if that had been as pointed as it sounded to his all too human ears.

****

The following day on the bridge was a bit strained. They had decided, with minimal discussion, to leave the altered duty rosters in place so that the culprit didn’t realize they were on to him. This left Sulu and Chekov scheduled as usual, but very notably had Uhura scheduled for Gamma shift. If nothing else, he should have twigged to something being hinky earlier, Jim realized, because Uhura hadn’t been around to irritate for over a week. As a matter of fact, there wasn’t a single female bridge crew member scheduled. Even the Yeomen were male, an oddity that had his curiosity twitching.

And now that he’d noticed it, the lack of women to flirt with was there in the back of his mind all day like a missing limb. He kept turning to lay an innuendo on Uhura, only to have to turn back, his fabulous history making pickup line unsaid. Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore and turned to Sulu, praying that one of the man’s varied and exhaustive hobbies would provide a conversational gambit.

“Mr. Sulu, it’s far too quiet in here. How goes the fencing club?”

Sulu turned with a big grin, “Great, sir, although we’re not meeting this week. Everyone’s in high spirits, though…”

Chekov waved a hand at Sulu, “That is because everyone is bitten by the love bug, Sulu, not because of your sword fighting.”

Smile tightening slightly, Sulu just shrugged, “Maybe so, maybe not. Besides, not everyone is bitten.”

“Love bug…?” Kirk leaned forward curiously, “What do you mean love bug?” He desperately hoped they weren’t talking literally, although he would have heard from Bones if they’d had another outbreak of spores or pollen or whatever it was last time… He really hoped.

The Russian gaped at him for a moment, “It is Valentine’s Day, sir!”

“St. Valentine’s Day is an old earth holiday celebrated on the 14th of February each year. The equivalent date is not for four more days.” Spock commented reprovingly.

“Yes, sir,” Chekov practically fell all over himself to explain, Sulu rolling his eyes, “It is the spirit of the thing, you see. Everyone is wanting to have someone to give presents to and to get presents from.”

“Yeah, I’ve had a real run on flowering plants. Managed to cultivate some reasonably rose-like things, and everyone is begging me for them for their sweethearts,” Sulu added with pride.

From there the conversation devolved into Chekov teasing Sulu about saving some flowers to give his own sweetheart and Sulu half-heartedly teasing back about Chekov not being old enough to celebrate Valentine’s Day in any of the truly entertaining ways. It was amusing, Kirk decided, and it kept him from wondering if those rumors he’d heard about Vulcan’s and chocolate were true.

****

Half an hour after the end of shift, Kirk clapped his hands in glee and strode out of his quarters to find Spock. He almost stepped straight on a shiny giftbox sitting outside his door. Looking around suspiciously, he saw only empty hallway, so he reached down and lifted the box. It was heavy and without even opening it, he could smell the chocolate inside. He inspected it gingerly and found a tag tucked off to one side.

Jim,

Take a hint.

Cupid

He was still staring at the box when Spock came around the corner at the end of the hallway carrying a… He paused to double check… Yes, that was indeed a teddy bear. It was pink and held a large velvet heart inscribed with the phrase “Be My Logical Valentine.”

“Captain…” Spock was holding the bear as though it was liable to explode at any second. “This was in the science lab… I am… unsure as to its purpose.”

“I found these outside my quarters just now.” Jim waved the box, “Had a note on it from ‘Cupid.’”

Spock’s eyebrow jumped, “This… bear also bore a note from said deity.”

“Oh?” Jim grinned, “What’s yours say?”

Spock glanced down at the bear, “I do not believe that is relevant, Captain.”

That did it, Jim couldn’t even begin to resist, “Oh, it totally is!” he slunk over to Spock and tried to grab the bear, only Vulcan reflexes saving it.

“Captain,” Spock backed up with Kirk following him step for step, trying to snag the bear in a juvenile game of keepaway.

“I’m off duty, Spock, I don’t have to be the Captain at this exact moment in time, and I want to know what’s on that note!” He leaned upon his toes to reach for the bear and misjudged, falling forward and colliding full on with his first officer. It was a lot like slamming into a brick wall at first, then Spock softened and his hand came up to brace Jim’s arm.

“Captain, are you unharmed?” Spock’s face was really close, Jim noted as he took advantage of the momentary distraction to make a grab for the bear. The Vulcan sidestepped at the last second, bear safely clutched in his hand, and Captain Kirk overbalanced and landed on his ass in the hallway. Before he could stop laughing, Spock was striding to his quarters, and when he emerged a moment later, the bear was not with him.

****

The bear and chocolates the command team had received seemed to signal something because suddenly letters from ‘Cupid’ were showing up everywhere. Over the next two days, Kirk saw Chekov get one at the helm that said ‘Open your damned eyes’ while he overheard someone mention that Uhura’d found one quoting an obscure Scottish poet. She’d taken the snippet to Scotty, and the gossip mill said she’d stayed the night. Jim wondered about what Spock thought of it, but he didn’t seem to be any more starchy than any other day recently, so he didn’t pry.

The notes were all anyone could talk about. People who were paired didn’t seem to get notes; as Chekov pointed out, they didn’t need Cupid’s help now, did they?

“Captain, I have a theory.” Jim glanced up from where he was studying his note thoughtfully. Spock still hadn’t let him see what had been on his. Although, the thought had occurred to him that if Spock was getting letters from Cupid then maybe he and Uhura weren’t together anymore after all.

“What’s that, Mr. Spock?”

“I have been reviewing the changes made to the duty rosters, and I believe I have discerned the pattern.” That caught Jim’s attention and he leaned forward, motioning for Spock to continue. “I believe that the changes made to the duty rosters correlate directly to the couples aboard the ship, both pre-existing and those brought together by ‘Cupid’s notes.”

“Wait, you mean to say that ‘Cupid’ is the one changing the duty rosters?”

“That would be the logical conclusion.”

“So…” Jim paused, “So, why?”

“I have never claimed to understand the illogical workings of the human mind. Especially in matters related to such an emotional holiday.”

“Okay, point taken. But how do we figure out who it is… I mean, we’ve got nothing on the console, nothing on any of the notes as far as I know. Hell, people are loving the whole setup, pun not intended but I get points for it anyway.” Jim grinned as Spock did exactly what he was hoping for and stared at him blankly.

“Be that as it may, Captain,” Oops, that was Spock’s ‘I’m getting cranky because I have a feeling I’m the butt of a joke’ voice, “it is our duty to determine who is tampering with official Starfleet orders.”

“It’s not really hurting anything, is it?” Kirk had been all for finding the guy when it was making Spock pissed at him, but the whole notes from Cupid thing was fun, and the crew morale was higher than it had been since last shore leave. Even the single folks were joining in the fun of pondering who Cupid was pointing each person at. “I mean, we could always wait a day or two and then worry about it… Right?” Jim turned his best puppy eyes on the Vulcan.

Imagine his surprise when it actually worked, “I predict that there is less than a 2.07% chance of the situation causing damage to the ship or crew. As Captain, it is your purview.”

Gaping openly was probably not the most suave response, but it was the best Jim could muster, “Okay, well… We’ll let Valentine’s Day come and go and see how it goes from there,” he smiled and plastered on his usual confidence, “So when are you going to tell me what your note said?”

“I believe I have work to finish in the labs, Captain. Excuse me.”

****

The day before Valentine’s Day, Jim arrived on the bridge to find a note on his seat. Interestingly enough, this one wasn’t for him.

Spock,

Logically, you should be able to spend a lot of time with someone without killing them if you’re in love. Logic and love don’t mix.

Cupid

Jim just stared at the note for a moment, then cleared his throat, “Mr. Spock, I believe this is yours.” He proffered the note. Spock stalked across from his station and took it without a word. Needless to say the rest of the morning was strained.

On a whim, he invited Spock to go to lunch with him, and was stiffly shot down. On his return, he was told that Spock had been summoned to Engineering to look over something Scotty was attempting. Scotty attempting anything made Jim nervous, but lately it was even worse. Scotty smiled and whistled cheerfully as he pushed his teams to their limit.

When Spock returned, he immediately reported that whatever it was Scotty had been trying hadn’t actually done what he’d intended. In fact, Spock’s whole report boiled down to ‘it didn’t do anything but sit there.’ The Chief Engineer had apparently given a cheerful shrug and patted the little experiment before sauntering off. It was downright creepy if you asked Jim, but no one had.

Spock turned to go back to his console and froze.

“Mr. Spock?”

“Captain… I believe something of yours has been misplaced on my console.”

Sure enough, there was another note, this one addressed to Jim.

Jim,

Opposites attract. Get with the program.

Cupid

Jim picked the note up and examined it carefully. No one had seen where it came from, of course, although Sulu mentioned he’d gotten one earlier that said ‘Hang in there.’ After a while he just shrugged it off and went back to his chair.

Opposites attract, huh?

****

Valentine’s Morning came bright and early, and Jim knew exactly what he had to do. Sneaking into the bathroom wasn’t necessary, but it was amusing, and he was still asleep enough to be easily amused. Listening carefully at the connecting door was completely necessary.

Finally, he heard Spock’s hall door slide open and then shut again. Breaking the entry code was a lot easier than hacking the Kobiyashi Maru, and within a minute, he was standing in the open doorway to Spock’s room. He’d never been in it before, but he didn’t linger. He was there for the bear, the bear, and nothing but the bear.

It wasn’t too hard to find, being garishly pink, however, the note wasn’t attached to it anymore. He was digging around in the desk drawers when the door slid open and he froze. “Shit.”

“Indeed, Captain. Was there something I can help you with?” Spock was extra starchy, but there was something in his voice. Something that reminded Jim of an old man who spoke to him with great affection.

“I was looking for the note. As if you didn’t know.”

“I had assumed as much, which is why I made a point to ensure that said note was in a very safe place,” he reached into a pocket and pulled out a familiar piece of paper, still disgustingly crisp despite everything.

Jim licked his lips, “That’s it, huh?” Spock simply nodded as the blond moved closer, “So…”

“Captain, I wonder if you’ve had an opportunity to ponder who it was that Cupid was attempting to… shoot you with, so to speak.” Spock lifted the note a little higher as Jim came closer.

“As if I’ve thought of anything else since I got the damned thing. But ‘get a hint’ and ‘get with the program’ don’t give me much to go on.” Jim stood up on tiptoe again, but the Vulcan shifted to tuck the note into the small of his back.

“I believe there was also ‘opposites attract,’ was there not.” Spock was watching him closely as Jim leaned in, reaching around with one arm to grasp his wrist.

“There was that, wasn’t there?” Jim leaned further until his breath brushed the tip of Spock’s ear.

“Indeed…” Spock’s eyes slid closed, “Jim…”

Jim grinned and pressed his lips to the fleshy point of Spock’s ear, waiting until he heard the barest stutter of breath and then…

He blew a raspberry.

Cupid needed a better hobby. Arrows were so passe.

****

Valentine’s Day, both the Captain and the First Officer of the USS Enterprise were very late arriving at the bridge. When they got there, no one had to guess what had happened since the esteemed Captain had left dark green hickeys clearly visible over the collar of Spock’s uniform.

Most people were too wrapped up in their own matches to care, but if anyone had been paying attention, they might have noticed Dr. McCoy, Chief Medical Grouch, slip Keenser a credit chip with a big sigh of mock disgust, and then wander off complaining about how nobody was going to get any work done with all these hearts floating around everywhere. Cupid’s job was done.


End file.
